Last night, I watched a Cubs game for the first time this entire season. And then I came to realize why I'm not a fan of that team.
Ryan Dempster, or "Dumpster" as I have taken to calling him, was due to start last night against my local team, the Diamondbacks, and promptly got shellacked, giving up 7 runs in just the first inning. He was pulled after 1/3 of an inning (shortest start ever?), and the Cubs' bullpen managed to settle down for the rest of the game, but they gave up a few more runs for a final score of 10-2 Diamondbacks.
The Cubs are no strangers to losing, but last night's epic ass-whupping made me realize what a black hole the Cubs' bullpen is. In astronomy, a black hole is a phenomena where a star collapses in on itself because of its gravity, and in the spot where the star used to be, a black hole forms. It's called a black hole cuz it sucks in everything around it, including light, like a vacuum. That is what has happened to the Cubs-they've collapsed in on themselves and they just plain suck.
Cartoon courtesy of yours truly.