Friday, September 25, 2009

Cracked nuts

For this week's post, I've decided to address a local story that's had my home city of Chicago buzzing.

Across town from my beloved White Sox, our rival Cubs have suspended for the rest of the season their local fucktard, Milton Bradley.

What set off this nut's latest suspension? Well, aside from the obviously crappy numbers he's put up all season, this nutjob has the nerve to accuse the fans of being racist towards him and lashed out at them during a postgame interview. Eventually, Bradley issued an apology by publishing a letter in the Chicago Tribune (you can read all about it here), but the damage was done and Bradley has driven the final nail into his coffin.

Cubs fans aren't racists. Long-suffering with semi-masochistic tendencies, given the Cubs' lack of postseason success? Yes. Racists? No. When I first started watching baseball, I was a Cubs fan. However, I eventually switched to the White Sox soon after the latter won the '05 World Series. I was tired of watching my former team choke time after time. Hell, one of the most popular players in Cubs history is Ernie Banks-who was black! If people hate Bradley, it's cuz he sucks at his job and is about as polite as Kanye West in the presence of Taylor Swift.

This last suspension has pretty much rung the death bell for Bradley's time in Chicago. Jim Hendry, the Cub's GM has said to the Tribune that teams who are interested in Bradley can start shopping now. Personally, I don't think Bradley has a snowball's chance in Hell of finding employment, given his diva personality.

And in other nutty news, my borderline-desperate GM Kenny Williams has awarded contract extensions to himself and just about all the coaches on our staff, but had the audacity to throw Jim Thome and Jose Contreras under the bus with Paul Konerko, Jermaine Dye, and Bobby Jenks likely to follow next. Well, most of the named were/are past their prime, but still! Most of our coaches are past their expiration dates, and we need replacements.
That's it for today!


GM-Carson said...

I used to think Kenny Williams was a decent GM, then came this season and all the stupid shit he did.

I have and forever will hate Milton Bradley, complete dickhead.

Burton said...

Bradley is a worthless blowhard. He and Kayne West should hang out.

GM-Carson said...

I'd love to see Kayne West pissed on by someone. And not in a kinky way, I'm not into that.

tamtam said...

hehe :) i know! hope nutty bradley saved his money cuz this will likely be his last year playing baseball ever.

i agree burtie, bradley and kanye should get together. they'd love each other's company

Burton said...

I don't know, I've re-thought that. Two colossal egos in the same room. It would be a self-love fest of epic proportions.

GM-Carson said...

Or the world could simultaneously explode at the same time.

tamtam said...

i'd love to see how long milton bradley and kanye west can sit next to each other in the same room. they'd rip each other to pieces in no time!! :D