Sunday, March 22, 2009

90% Mental

"Baseball is ninety percent mental and the other half is physical." Yogi Berra

Yogi Berra was well known for his statements that made, at best, logical gaps, at worst, no sense whatsoever. It clearly does not take genius to play baseball and locker room interviews with most athletes often prove this. So here is a compilation of quirky quotes, quips, and quizzical utterances made by baseball players and conveniently categorized into key topics.

Science and Health
-“The sun has been there for 500, 600 years.” Mike Cameron, Brewers CF
-Brooklyn Dodgers Pitcher Billy Loes explains how he missed a ground ball "I lost it in the sun!"
-"The Bible never says anything about dinosaurs. You can't say there were dinosaurs when you never saw them. Somebody actually saw Adam and Eve. No one ever saw a Tyrannosaurus Rex." Carl Everett, Mariners OF
-"The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing." Dizzy Dean, Pitcher (Cardinals, Cubs, Browns)
-"Therapy can be a good thing; it can be therapeutic." Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez

Math
-On reports that 50 percent of ballplayers use steroids, Athletics star Rickey Henderson replied "Well, Rickey’s not one of them, so that’s 49 percent right there."
-"You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six." Yogi Berra
-"Me and George and Billy are two of a kind." Baseball player Mickey Rivers, on his relationship with George Steinbrenner and Billy Martin.
-After a 1-0 game Dizzy Dean explained "The game was closer than the score indicated."
-"There is one word in America that says it all, and that word is, 'You never know.'" Pitcher Joaquin Andujar (Astros, Cardinals, Athletics)
-Mets announcer Ralph Kiner "That was Benes' fifth strikeout on the day. He came in with 94, so now he has 104 strikeouts on the year."

Moral Conundrums
-Asked if he preferred grass or Astroturf Phillies pitcher, Tug McGraw said “I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf."
-Upon being beaned by a pitch, former Giants second baseman Tito Fuentes complained “They shouldn’t throw at me. I’m the father of five or six kids.”
-When asked about serving as a role model for kids, Andre Dawson explained "I want all the kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I want all the kids to copulate me."
-“Every time that I have ever tried to help a woman out, I have been incarcerated.” Jose Canseco

The Game Itself
-"A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings." Earl Wilson, Pitcher (Red Sox, Tigers, Padres)
-“I am the most loyal player money can buy.” Don Sutton who pitched for the Dodgers, Astros, Athletics, Brewers, and Angels
-Padres announcer Jerry Coleman: "Winfield goes back to the wall. He hits his head on the wall and it rolls off! It's rolling all the way back to second base! This is a terrible thing for the Padres!"
-Cubs announcer Harry Caray on Jorge Orta: "Aw, how could he lose the ball in the sun, he's from Mexico!"
-"I will perish this trophy forever." - Milwaukee Braves Shortstop Johnny Logan
-"The only thing that keeps this organization from being recognized as one of the finest in baseball is wins and losses at the major league level." Devil Rays GM Chuck Lamar on his team's performance.
-"A lot of good ballgames on tomorrow, but we're going to be right here with the Cubs and the Mets." Thom Brennaman, Chicago Cubs broadcaster.

Saturday Night Live at its Best!
Sports Videos, News, Blogs

Will Ferrell as Harry Caray

16 comments:

GM-Carson said...

I love the Dave Winfield quote, I just picture his head bouncing off the outfield wall and rolling back towards the infield...gross, but funny.

MLB Home Run said...

When asked, "What will you spend your World Series bonus on?", Tug McGraw responded, "I'll spend 80% on women and booze, then I probably waste the rest."

Posted link on http://www.mlbhomerun.com

GM-Carson said...

I love how "women and booze" isn't considered wasting.

Burton said...

Tug was a very special man.

LONG DRIVE: A PHILLIES BLOG said...

Great quotes. The Julian Taveras beer goggles quote belongs among the ranks of the best ever.

GM-Carson said...

Because of Julian's quote, I am now a fan of his.

tamtam said...

ozzie guillen's 'i wanna die on the field' quote should have made it here. that was pretty outageous.

also, thanks for posting the will ferrill as harry carey video. im too young to remember harry carey, but my dad said that the man was hilarious, and really loopy. i remember seeing that skit on a 'SNL: best of will ferrill' dvd, and thought-"wow, back when SNL was actually FUNNY!!"

GM-Carson said...

Tam-Tam: I think Burton might do some more "quote" posts, there's plenty to work with.

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