Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Old Heads

I took the time to compose a list of some of the oldest players at each position to assemble a 25 man roster. I think this team could beat half the teams in MLB based on the pitching staff alone. I grew up in the '80s watching these guys and I hope they never retire! By the way, I still think Jesse Orosco could be this squad's left-handed specialist. Potential problem, having Mesa and Vizquel back on the same team again. Going with a 6-man rotation, figuring they need the extra day off, and a 13-man bullpen because these dudes are old after all!

Florida Old Heads:

1B- Jeff "Mr. Marlin" Conine (39) and Julio "Father Time" Franco (47)

2B- Jeff "Racist" Kent (38)

SS- Omar "Ozzie Smith II" Vizquel (39)

3B- "My Cousin" Vinny Castilla (38)

Utility Infielder- Eric "E.Y." Young (38)

OF- Barry "Chemically Enhanced Superman" Bonds (41), Steve "Also Chemically Enhanced" Finely (41), Ruben "Played in Mexico" Sierra (40), and Brian "Use to Play Defensive Back" Jordan (39)

Pinch-runner- Rickey "Stolen Base King" Henderson (46)

SP- Tom "Hockey-Boy" Glavine (40), Jaime "Grungy Starbucker" Moyer (43), Randy "Pigeon Killer" Johnson (42), Kenny "Cameraman" Rogers (41), Greg "Tourette's Syndrome" Maddux (40), and David "Boomer" Wells (42)

RP- Mike "Hold Master" Timlin (40), Mike "Where is Leo Mazzone?" Remlinger (40), Roberto "Gut" Hernandez (41), Terry "Jesse Orosco II" Mulholland (43), Jose "Joe Table" Mesa (39), and Chris "Nobody Knows Me" Hammond (40)

CP- John "Love the Beard" Smoltz (39)



GM-Carson said...

does "CP" mean that John Smoltz is your designated Cerebral Palsy?


The Rev said...

Wait a second...

Tom Gordon, at 38, doesn't make the team? He could sneak in there.

GM-Carson said...

Tom Gordon is too wet behind the years yet to be on my squad. I want real veterans...ha!